I Am...

... my own worst enemy.

I'm also my own best friend!

That's pretty awesome isn't it?

I shared an article about Quantum Physics a while ago on Facebook.  For the last 3 or 4 weeks I've thought about writing an article with my theories on how it relates to us on an individual and a global level, but I've realised tonight that I've allowed myself to be distracted from it, so it hasn't been started until now.

That's how I'm my own worst enemy.  Procrastination in all things.  And now I've procrastinated about it again tonight, (but I'm calling that "planning" so it's all good!) and it's really late and I need to sleep.  So I've just written myself a note: 

"QUANTUM PHYSICS THEORY - Don't be distracted!!"

So my best friend just left my worst enemy a note to remind her to be a better person in the morning.  And now she/I will be!  And this blog will be posted on Sunday 4th January 2015.  There, now my Best Friend has just left Competetive Me a challenge!  Because Honest Me won't allow Procrastinator Me to beat Competitive Me by changing the date if I look like I'm running out of time...

And that's only the first, (very shallow) rabbit hole!!

Would like me to give you the guided tour? Link arms with me then, I do like to feel physical closeness when walking and talking with someone who wants a glimpse inside my mind.  That's better!  Now we're friends forever!  However, right now I'm off to bed, but I'll be back with a further leg of the journey once I've had some shut eye.  See you soon!! :)

I added this photo purely because I love koala bears.  It's my blog, and I'll illustrate it how I like! :) 

*I later realised that when I was little, my teddy bear was a koala - Fred the Ted - but he hadn't entered my head when I chose this photo.  I was originally looking for a dreamscape photo but this one popped out at me! At bed time!

Now before we go any further, I want to tell you a little bit about myself because Quantum and Metaphysics are known as being very complicated and scary and not for us mere mortals to understand.  Well worry not. I left school at 16 with a very disappointing four O Levels and 2 CSEs.  My Mum was horrified, but to be fair, I was quite pleased to have B grades in English and Maths, as well as C's in French and Religious Education (Catholic school!) and Grades 2 and 3 CSEs in Geography and Geology.  I'd refused to take some of the other exams on principle (I'd never wanted to take exams in English Literature or History, so there was no way I was putting any effort into them!) and I missed my Drama theory exam because I'd had no money to get to school that day.  So that was my lot, and to be honest (because I always am, you'll get used to it as time goes on), the only reason the CSEs look good is because of Jedi Mind Trickery.  

I actually only took one CSE, and that was Religion, but because Grade 1 is equivalent to O Level grade C, and O Levels are higher/more "respectable", I switched that over.  By the same token, Grades D and E don't look too great, but when you switch them over to CSEs and make them grades 2 and 3, they look far more impressive!  Up here for dancing!! *taps temple*

As further confirmation of the above, this conversation happened while I was in the process of writing: 

What I'm basically saying, in a very roundabout way, is that you don't need to already have letters after your name or loads of qualifications to look into Quantum Theory and actually understand it.  I found this article a month or two ago, and once I'd read that and watched the film at the end, What The Bleep!?: Down The Rabbit Hole, I found I was applying the theory to everything that was happening around me, and it was all very clear.  I do highly recommend reading and watching them, and here's why. 

Note: I originally thought I'd do a review/opinion piece on the film, but I have FAR too much to say to limit the conversation for now.  I'm leaving this in for clarification and information though, because it really is a great film!

There are a couple of familiar faces - Marlee Matlin is the main character Amanda (I'd seen her in The L Word, which a friend and I discovered a year or so ago and watched the entire box set within weeks! It's hot stuff though, don't watch it with your teenagers, neither of you will be comfortable in that situation!)  Marlee (the actress, come on, concentrate please! Hah!) had lost almost all of her hearing by the age of 18 months, and her biography on IMDB shows that she's an incredibly inspirational woman:

Marlee is also a spokeswoman for the National Captioning Institute. In 1995, she testified at a congressional hearing and helped get a law passed that requires all TV sets 13 inches or larger to be manufactured with built-in chips to provide closed captioning on their screens; this was a godsend for deaf viewers.

Amanda's best friend Jennifer is played by Elaine Hendrix (who I remember as the step mum in the more recent version of The Parent Trap; my girls adored that film!) After reading Marlee's profile, I had a feeling that Elaine would be just as inspirational.  I wasn't disappointed.  She's rescued lots of animals, written books, run a successful dance studio, as well as lots of other achievements, but the thing for which I'll love her forever, is this: 

Favorite movie of all-time is Star Wars: Episode IV - A New Hope (1977) 

So there we go.  I'm fan-girling over the lead characters before we've even got started!  

The movie opens with written words

In the beginning was the Void,

Teeming with infinite possibilities

Of which you are one

There are then a lot of talking heads, but these are some of the cleverest heads I've seen.  I love the way it's put together; there's a really interesting story with Amanda going about her daily life, but seeing glimpses of what appears to be a parallel reality, and one of the talking heads, Ramtha, asks if there's a possibility that all realities exist simultaneously side by side. My conclusion is that yes, they do, and in this review I'll attempt to explain why.

A Dream Is a Wish...

I was lucky enough to go on holiday to America last May, for the first time in my life.  It was an awesome holiday, despite something of a wobbly start with the first few days really not going to plan at all.  Everything worked out more magically than I ever could have imagined after the initial wobble though, and I was treated to a first class flight to visit friends, followed by a Disney Cruise with them to the Bahamas and Disney's private island!  I definitely couldn't have dreamed that one up, because I didn't even know they had a private island until the invite came through!   I'll treasure the memories of that holiday forever, because the company would be great wherever we were, but to enjoy it in those surroundings just made it all the better.  Not bad from a potentially disastrous trip!

In my cabin (which wasn't called a cabin, but a "Stateroom"!!) there was a pillow on the bed, which I had to really restrain myself from stealing.  It's a good job I only had a small suitcase with me if I'm honest, because if there had been room I might not have won the fight with my conscience.  I loved it so much, I took a photo of it

"A dream is a wish your heart makes when you're fast asleep"

Scrolling down my Facebook wall earlier, a recently added friend (who I only speak to online), has posted asking if anyone's ever experienced dream sharing.  It's not something I'd heard of consciously, so I peeked into the comments (we don't communicate often, I liked a few of his posts on a political page, but I don't really bother with politics any more) and one of his friends said "I think it's when two souls communicate via a dream" .  My friend then said that he thinks he's done it a few times now, because he's spoken to the people after the dream and they remember having the same dream.  He then went on to talk about quantum physics and entanglement, and I wholeheartedly agreed with everything he said (as usual!)

That got me to thinking about dreams in general, in line with this song lyric from one of the Disney princess films (Snow White I think, but I could be wrong).  

Now, I don't know about you, but when I was little, I used to have some really amazing dreams.  One particular recurring dream was of a giant dog that would come into the square in front of our house, and all us kids would run outside to play with it.  It was like a Old English Sheepdog (as in the Dulux adverts), but taller than our houses!  He'd hunker down on the floor so we could all climb up on him, and he'd take us for rides on his back.  I always seemed to be up by his head, but I'm sure there were four or five of us at a time. I had that dream many times!

Another recurring theme was the ability to fly.  In my dreams, it was more like swimming in the air.  I could go wherever I wanted, and it was no effort at all. I loved those dreams, when I could explore wherever I wanted to!

As I got older, my dreams got a bit darker, and less fun.  I stopped flying, and instead, I'd be throwing the slowest punches that never hurt the person they were aimed at, or trying to run away from something, only to find that the floor was made of treacle.  All very far removed from the sweet dreams I used to have of playing with all of my friends and a huge, fluffy, friendly dog in the sunshine!

What happens to us to take those dreams away as we get older?  I can't be the only one who remembers wonderful dreams like that, and yet I can't remember the last time she had such a fun filled trip from the comfort of my own bed.

I've been doing a lot of meditating lately.  It's helped massively in dealing with the anxiety I was suffering after my nervous breakdown.  Apparently it's not called a nervous breakdown any more, I can't remember how we're supposed to refer to it these days, but everyone seems to understand when I describe it as that. 

I was advised a few months ago not to attempt meditation on my own, so I looked for some guided ones on YouTube.  It's been a massive help, and I've been guided towards some fantastic ones that I alternate between.  I also read a lot of articles, and some of those have pointed me towards new ones to try - every one of them has been fantastic!!

I was attempting to resist the temptation to point people towards the ones I've done, but they've helped me so hugely that I feel it only fair to list them at the end of the article.  Let me know how you get on if you try any of them out.  It may well be something you'll come back to if you decide to follow this link that I came across though.  

I clicked it purely out of interest when I saw the title of the video, How to Access Superconsciousness... With a title like that, along with an innately curious nature, of course I had to give it a go!!  Well, I'm afraid to say, I found it quite difficult to do properly.  I liked the fact that it gave directions about what to do, and that before it even begins, it says "...this is just for you..." but I did feel as though I had far too many thoughts and kind of beat myself up over it.  However, a conversation with a friend who's something of an expert in the field of meditation helped me with that when he said that silencing your mind completely is almost impossible to do.  His advice was to acknowledge the thoughts as they arrive, but then to switch my attention back to where I should be focused and not to give the thought any more time.

It's still difficult to do, so please don't feel disheartened if you find it complicated or even impossible, because meditation really does take a lot of practice, but it's effective right from the very first attempt.  Take it from a novice who's had some amazing and almost immediate results!

By the end of watching it for the first time, I hoped that I'd immediately be able to telpathically communicate and manage Astral Travel, but it's been over a week now and I still can't do it.  Yet!!  However, I have discovered a LOT of new skills and knowledge in that week!  My life has changed considerably for the better, in ways that you just wouldn't believe if I told you.  I'm afraid that means that I can't tell you for the moment.  Sorry! 


(*not sorry!)


Well, come on, I've already admitted that I've recently had a nervous breakdown, and that resulted in a 3 week vacation in our local mental health ward.  If I start telling unbelievable stories now I'll lose all credibility and you won't even give the Superconsciousness thing a go.  My challenge to you is to go and get comfy, sit comfortably in a dark room (I usually get into bed to do this one), close your eyes, and listen to the entire video.  Keep an open mind for a few days, take note of any changes in your life, and come back and let me know in a week whether you think it was a waste of time or not.  If that's the case, then I really will be sorry for having wasted your time - however, I honestly don't expect I'll be handing out any apologies for this.  Let me know though, I'm always happy to be proven wrong.  It's certainly transformed things for me! 

This Christmas has been absolutely magical.  I've spent a whole week with loved ones, celebrating both Christmas, and my beautiful little grandson's first birthday.  It's been awesome, we've not had a single fall out over anything, and we've laughed together for hours at a time!  We had fantastic food despite the fact I was bedridden on Christmas Eve and didn't get any pre-Christmas food shopping done, and we've all felt the love.  A lot of love!!

In summary, a dream is indeed a wish your heart makes when you're fast asleep - and after following the guidance in that YouTube meditation a few times, I'm finding that Gabrielle was right, and Dreams can come true!  Surely that's worth an hour of your time?

Especially when I let you know that one of the things I learnt from the video is that an hour's worth of meditation gives you more energy than a few hours of normal sleep!  I generally take my iPhone to bed, get comfy, put my phone on silent (that bit's important, you don't want to get part way through and be interrupted by a phone call!) and plug in my earphones.  Once the video ends, you can safely drift off to sleep and then just carry on with your day to day routine.  Easy peasy, lemon squeezy!  

I'm hoping tonight will be the night I master the Astral bit, I'll come see you if I do :)


Please ignore the next bit if you think all this meditation malarkey is all a bit "new age-y", but at least you know you can come back to refer if you do feel a desire to follow up after the consciousness one :)

These are some of the other guided meditations I've done, and why I recommend them:

Chakra Cleansing - This is a good one to go to in between sessions of the superconsciousness meditation.  I find this one really helpful for clearing my mind and opening me up to the messages in that video next time I go back to it.

Prosperity meditation - This one I was pointed to in a comments discussion on Facebook a couple of nights ago.  It had almost immediate results, at least in changing my concept of manifestation.  I went from knowing manifestation was possible with lots of positive thinking, to seeing manifestation happen almost instantaneously within that same conversation <3

Violet Flame meditation - I found this within the same hour of the prosperity meditation and saved it for later.  I did the meditation last night, and it's left me with a sense of enormous well being (Parklife!) in the time since then.

All of the above have been extremely helpful for me, but I would definitely encourage you to have a look around for yourself as well, as you'll be guided towards meditations that will be of help for your own particular circumstances and needs.  Please do contact me if you want to discuss any questions you might have, and I'll do my best to help you :)